Aria's Birth

Here she is! Our beautiful little angel!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Aria Marie Matte

8lbs 9 oz

19.1 In

Born: January 1, 2014 2:08 pm

Look at my New Year's Baby! Gorgeous isn't she? I know I am her mom and all...but really. And yes, that is her real hair lol. 

Ok, so this is mostly for my friends who are pregnant and have been dying to hear my labor story. TMI WARNING to all...

I went to my doctor Dec 26th... baby still measuring big. Doc tried a membrane sweep ( ouch ) to try and get things going because he said due to my small pelvis, I could have a little bit of trouble birthing a larger baby. The membrane sweep was, well... it wasn't exactly unbearable, but it wasn't a walk in  the park either. For those of you who are like me and had no idea what a membrane sweep is... basically the doctor goes in and separates your water bag from your uterus ( he is separating the membranes ). It hurts but only lasts for a minute.  Doc thought that would get things moving as I was 1 cm and 80% effaced, but come the weekend and still no baby! Let's just say I walked 10 miles to get that baby out, ate spicy foods, and you know did a lot of that other thing to induce labor... and nothing. 

So we see the doctor again on the Monday, and he tries a second membrane sweep... and nothing. I'm very hormonal and devastated. They all say be patient and "when the baby is ready.." blah blah blah. I will no longer judge any woman wanting to do everything in her power to have that baby. I was SO against inducing...until the end. lol. 

To ease my non labor blues... my mom took me shopping, to lunch, to get my nails done...anything to get my mind off the fact that I was not having the baby. 

  

But I didn't have to wait long bc doctor was still concerned about Aria's size so he asked to see me the next day (Dec 31st). I saw him that morning, and he confirmed I could be induced that afternoon ( while not medically necessary, he said he felt better inducing to reduce problems for a vaginal birth). I REALLY wanted to avoid a C section, and of course was ready... so ... IT"S GO TIME.

Eric and I went home, got our minds right, had our "last supper" if you will at Castalano's and went in around 2 pm to start the induction. Well... here is where every preconception I had of labor gets thrown out the window. 

So we check in... and I assume it's a long process. Nope. I walk in... say I am getting induced. And they bring me to a room... tell me to strip... and get in the bed. Well, I tie the gown. Because well I don't want my ass open to the world. (first time mom mistake #1--- assuming you have a shred of dignity left ). The nurses come in... and have a nice little laugh at me. I believe they said something like "Aw look how cute... she's all modest." um... sorry for not getting in the stirrups right off the bat. Jeez. 

So they hook me up.. and apparently I was ironically have contractions. Pretty big ones too. But I didn't really feel much pain.  (first time mom mistake #2--- assuming you won't have much pain because you 'aren't feeling the contractions' hahahah poor little Brittany....)

Fastforward about 6 hours ( close to midnight ) and I am having what was at that time the worst pain I have every experienced. Contractions were awful. I am sorry...but I am not going to sugar coat it. Some awesome women have had natural birth and said it was a "high" and that it "really wasn't that bad." I'm calling bullshit. Sorry for all the language but it's true. While everyone else in the world is counting down to the new year I am basically begging for my epidural and shooting hate stares at my night nurse.

The problem was.... despite being 90% effaced and about  3 cm dilated at this point... my cervix was still extremely tough. They wanted to give me four doses of the cervix softeners... but bc my contractions were so close together, I only got one dose at 2 pm earlier that day. So I was having full blown contractions that weren't doing anything bc of how tough my cervix was. :( 

FINALLY around 1 am epidural guy is able to give me the epidural. And I believe afterwards I said the words "I love you" to the man. No joke. (first time mom mistake #3--- assuming the epidural is a big bad monster instead of an old friend). Instant relief. Instant relaxation. I highly respect the women that go natural, I truly do. But I in no way condemn the many women like me who choose the epidural. And it was NOT bad. So many non moms say how scared they are of the "needle"---- ladies, at that point I would have stuck that needle in my eye if it meant getting relief. Seriously... it was not bad. A little prick... a little back cramp... sitting very still for about 5 minutes... then boom. Comfort..happiness....rainbows. 

After I received my epidural, I of course went numb waist down which, yes is weird and not desirable, but again worth it. They then began the pitocin, and Eric and I got in a few hours of sleep. 

I thought for sure the pitocin would make me have the baby by early morning...but NOTHING. I was barely 4 cm by 8 am... and just pissed at this point. I hadn't eaten since 11 am the day before and was just begging for something to happen. 

Of course we also decided to have our little girl on one of the busiest days of the hospital's yet...with in an HOUR there were three babies born ( Aria was one of the them). The doctor was quite busy... but he finally got to me around 11 am and broke my water. No biggie, didn't feel it. But around 1230 pm, I was in transition and feeling everything again. The epi had worn off and I was MISERABLE. These were WAY worse than what I was feeling the night before. I had nurses and family around me coaching me through it. Wow... again props to those fighters that go natural. 

Finally I got another dose of medicine and went numb again. Then came the nausea... yes I know it was from the epi and lack of eating for at that point 24 hours, but I would still choose epi. The nausea sort of gave me a slight panic attack right before it was time to push. I suddenly had the feeling that I wanted to roll my ankles even though I couldn't and freaked out for some reason. So Eric rolled them for me to I guess suppress  the crazy and I threw up. Felt much better afterwards lol ( I was a hot mess at this point ). 

Then my nurse starts the pushing process with me and then doc comes in and we really start. I was NOT prepared for this. I was told from a lot of people... oh you know you will just push for a bit. Um no. Try an hour. You just feel so ridiculous but at that point you honestly don't care. You have lost every shred of dignity at this point... my legs were not only in the stirrups, but because she was a hefty little thing ( and we found out soon coming out head AND elbow first ) I had to also hold my own thighs to get more leverage. Attractive. Husbands... there will come a time when you will see your wife in the worst possible position ever. This is it. 

So pushing was different. I don't know if I had any preconceptions...but I definitely did not think it was going to be that hard considering I had the epi.  

(first time mom mistake #4--- assuming epi makes it EASY). No I did not feel "pain" at this point.... but the strain of trying to push something out of your...well you know.... is not a pleasant thing no matter how numb you are. They do the cliche count to ten thing... except by 6 I was ready to kill someone bc I was running out of breath each time. Doc would tell me my best pushes were ALWAYS 7-10, but I don't know still how I had the oxygen to push. And the noises I was making... well let's just say my family outside thought I was dying. Eric now describes it has a karate chop sound...lmao. here is cute pic btw of the CROWD  I had gathered at the hospital...

What love and support we have!

Ok... so fastforward about 30 min into pushing... I get nauseous again. Badly. I scream I am about to throw up... and I do. Except for not eating anything in 28 hours, and having just thrown up the mounds of ice chips I was allowed to live on...m y body had no choice but to throw up bile. yea I told you tmi warning. That was AWFUL. I thought I was dying... seriously lol. But doc and nurses said it actually helped quite about. The intense strain on my abdomen actually did a lot of work down there... and fastforward another 30 min and doc promised me three more huge pushes and she would be out. 

Push 1.... intense. Doc can see her "full" head of hair...more like her MANE. All I remember the doc saying is "you can braid this hair already." I pushed so hard when it was time to rest again I apparently passed out a bit. I remember my nurse plucking in me in the cheek to wake me up!

Push 2... more intense. Doc mentions a big technical term that meant she was coming out with her arm up too ( elbow was at temple basically)... Ah. So that's why I had to push for so damn long. I was NOT giving up at this point. All I could think was... I don't want her in that position for long, and I DON"T want the vacuum thing. Again, passed out a bit after that 7-10 mess. 

Push 3...I don't remember much. I just remember yelling and telling myself I was about to finally meet my little girl. rEric was great the entire time... he kept telling me in my ear I could do it. Then Sure enough... like they said... instant relief when she was out. This next part was so surreal. I remember seeing her hair first and thinking oh my god that's my daughter. Honestly, the second thing I thought ( and asked Eric) was "did I shit myself?!" lol I was so worried... very proud to say no! SCORE. Then I saw her little hand... and I think that's when I started crying. For some reason her hand made her real...

They plopped my sweet angel on my chest, and Eric  and I were in AWE. I couldn't believe it. I am still teary eyed when I think of that moment. Nothing can prepare a first time mom for this. You think you know what you will feel when you finally get to hold your little one. After 9 long months... she is in your arms. And PERFECT. I am not ashamed to say it... I was worried "what if I have an ugly baby?!" You know you have all thought it, I'm just saying it. Well regardless of whether she was ugly or not, you will not know. Because in that moment she is perfect.  My awesome nurse Malika captured this moment for us perfectly...

What a beautiful, beautiful moment. I had my entire world in my arms and next to me. And yes, you truly forget everything from the last 24 hours. You forget the pain, the pressure, the fact that she just shit black tar all over the doctor and nurses the moment she came out of me.  I just kept talking to her telling her I was here. Hoping she would know it was her momma holding her. 

So surreal. So awesome. So don't want to do it again for a long time. lol But so worth it to meet our little angel.

 At first I was going to write about all the "right after giving birth" stuff...but I figure I have to draw the line somewhere :)

 Here are few more pics in case you didn't see the million that are all over...

 that is about 10  min after birth...

such a proud daddY!

Ok, I have no more energy lol. The next entry is going to be a real tough one for me to write.... the FIRST TWO WEEKS. I have so much to say about this. So much to tell my soon to be mom friends because I wish I would have known!!! Stay tuned....